“I’ve been counting down the days until my first rodeo on the new Italian stallion and finally that day has arrived. I’m excited to try the bike for the first time but also to begin cultivating my moustache which has grown wildly out of control over the Holidays and to see if we can cut a deal with ‘Team Go Shave’ at the track or else get a custom fit helmet. ”

“My immediate goal is to not knock anybody over while turning around really quickly on the paddock, but also to understand the potential of the beard and the power it commands in terms of publicity and mesmerised random strokers and to use this to good effect in racing, attracting sponsors and distracting my competitors, if I had charged 10e per stroke so far, it could keep me in tyres for the year”