May 7, 2019

Superstar Guy Martin Returns to winning ways at Tandragee

Superstar Guy Martin Returns to winning ways at Tandragee

Once synonymous with being a bit noisy, slow and s*** – Guy Martin, has reinvigorated a wave of intense interest in the Irish Classic Bike Racing scene following a compelling performance at Tandragee on Saturday.

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Classics are suddenly cool again

The outspoken Lincolnshire star, berated for his non-appearance at the recent Cookstown races, has allayed public outrage and concerned stalkers who flocked to the Orritor event, by claiming an emphatic victory in the Classic 1000cc by over seven seconds from Richard Ford, the only other competitor in that class and who suffered a puncture, going on to break the class record of 90mph and posting a combined time of 1hrs 46mins to complete the 5 lap race around of the Tandragee circuit.

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Guy getting the knee down

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” The biggest problem was burnt oil on me visor ” said Martin, who sporadically smacked himself on the side of his head and complained about ringing, throbbing, buzzing and clicking sounds in his ear drums from the exhaust noise, ” if one of those ol girls p***ed herself, you only had 17 secs to react or it were a one-way-ticket straight into a bail of straw at well over 20mph “


exclaimed the international superstar, famed for being the worlds fastest cyclist that ever flew across the english channel on a solar powered hovercraft with one arm tied behind his back while playing a tin-whistle.

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” The 500cc Norton was in a different league, what are they making, 45-50bhp ? ” said a bemused Guy; ” that thing was running nitrous for sure, I’m not saying it should be stripped down and checked by scrutineers for signs of foul play, because they wouldn’t even know what to look for, but bloodie ‘eck, she were s***-off-a-shove quick and he was gone down the back straight “


said a slightly perturbed Mr. Martin with an anxious expression as he gazed across his clicking home-built BSA Rocket.

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” bigger and stronger next year, we’ll check the rule book for desmosedici valve actuators and a straight cut box and see if we can muster up something from a bit of tinfoil and some discarded coke bottles “


said Guy, as his phone rang in a polyphonic ‘McGyver’ ringtone a**igned to Tyco’s Hector Neil.

Overall race winner Dean Stimpson on a Vintage Norton 500, was followed by Barry Davidson, sixth overall, and winner of the Classic 350 race whom was overheard in the paddock as saying Guy’s involvement in the vintage class is to be welcomed as the increased interest in classic motorcycles was palpable at the weekend and reflected in a marked increase in demand and residual values for twin cylinder 350’s, with some changing hands for figures in excess of 5k above their expected market value.


Source: Superstar Guy Martin Returns to winning ways at Tandragee

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